Boundaries are a part of self-care. They are healthy, normal, and necessary.” ~Doreen Virtue

It’s July! Before we get into what I want to share this month, let’s start with our promotions. We have an incredible “Christmas in July” promo running this month.

We are still running our Winter Weekday promotion, it’s a massive saving, best you book now to avoid disappointment.

This month I would like to share some insights into what I have gained. I am so incredibly proud of myself for achieving one of the many goals I have set for myself this year. “To speak my truth and stand up for myself”

For the last few weeks I have been on my continuous journey of self-discovery. A journey undertaken by many, but few who actually make the changes needed to live a more purposeful life.

For me personally, it was to open my throat chakra in order to find my voice and speak my truth. To realise when one of my boundaries had been crossed, and to speak up.

Boundaries are tools that enable us to feel safe, strong, and empowered in our relationships. As your journey progresses, you’ll begin to feel more empowered by the truth, that it’s your right to make the choices that are best for you.

I still have the journal entry that sparked my journey into boundary setting. It says, in black pen, “I wish I could speak my truth. If I can learn to speak my truth, then I will accomplish many things before I die”

Dramatic? Maybe. But I was tired of being a pushover, a people-pleaser.

I’d written it the day after I’d been the recipient of unwanted behaviour towards me, yet again. It happened often that I couldn’t speak up for myself. I’d waited in silence, hoping the person would mind-read my discomfort and know that this is not right.

The next morning, I took my pen and articulated what I saw as my Great Awakening in life: setting boundaries, communicating authentically, and take care of the needs of my inner self.

This challenge presented in all areas of my life. My tendency to people-please led to a sense of imbalance in relationships with many in my life.

I was constantly betraying myself, constantly designing my life around others’ desires. The result was a life that felt not quite my own.

If you leave conflicts wishing you’d spoken up for yourself; if you feel drained in social situations because you feel like you’re performing; if you over-commit to obligations and under-commit to activities that bring you joy; if you feel like you give much more than you receive in your relationships: this can be the time you break the pattern and begin speaking—and living—your truth.

“You change for two reasons: Either you learn enough that you want to, or you’ve been hurt enough that you have to.” ~Unknown

So how can you create and maintain healthy boundaries?

By speaking your truth.

Building boundaries is like any muscle or practice—the more you work with it, the better it serves you!
Boundaries are about strength and self-respect.
Boundaries help us to communicate what we want, and to stand up for ourselves. Boundaries help us to be honest with others, and to lead the lives we most want to lead.

Boundaries mean we can avoid resentment, and the feeling that anyone is trampling all over us. We can be lovingly firm, and clear.
Boundaries can be drawn whenever we feel a sense of intrusion, injustice or anger rising.

Our boundaries tell the world what we will and won’t accept. They set us free to love.
We teach people how to treat us, so we have to learn how to treat ourselves incredibly well. We have to be willing to speak up for what we want, to stand up for ourselves and to share our truth. With no expectation that others will fall into line with that.

Everyone else is free to act exactly as they wish to. But we can be clear about what does and doesn’t work for us, and on what we deserve.
We can be clear that we deserve only the best.

The clearer we get, and the clearer we are, the more our lives will come into alignment. The more we’ll attract the people and the experiences that meet us where we are. The more we’ll be able to stand in our own truth, in our own surety, regardless of anyone else’s actions.

It feels good to know yourself this well. It feels good to be able to communicate what you want, and what you need, and to feel that power rising.

It feels good to take responsibility for your part in any relationship or interaction, to own your 50%. No more, and no less.
It feels good to decide you will take no shit. And in knowing that, be able to relax.
It feels good to know your edges; what you will and won’t accept. To be clear in what you’re worth. So that you can stand in your strength and then soften to love others in freedom.

With love,
Tania